5 books that every modern dater should read

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Are you a lifelong learner and an avid reader? Truthfully, a growing number of modern daters are switched-on individuals who understand the importance of wisdom and knowledge. I’d like to recommend 5 powerful books that every modern dater should totally read! ?

  • 48 Laws of Power (by Robert Greene)

If you are keen to learn more about human nature, this is the most paramount book that you have to read. Robert Greene is a realist who has true insights into human nature, power dynamics and strategies. At the end of the day, power is the ultimate thing that people want. Incidentally, if you like the American TV show House of Cards, you would definitely like Robert Greene’s books because House of Cards was inspired by 48 Laws of Power which teaches you exactly how successful individuals operate in love, life and business. I would argue that most of Robert Greene’s strategies also apply to dating and relationships because human nature doesn’t change.

  • How to Instantly Connect with Anyone (by Leil Lowndes)

If you would like to find a high-value partner such as an attractive woman from Ukraine, you should read this book in which you will learn 96 tricks for success in relationships. Though we know knowledge is power, the implementation of knowledge is true power. That means you have to use these strategies in this book once you’ve understood them fully. I actually recommend every book written by Leil Lowndes because she is honest, hilarious and wise.

  • Money: A Love Story (by Kate Northrup)

This book is an Amazon best seller. Those who are not very good at finances can read this book which includes very practical and down-to-earth information about how to manage personal finances. According to Kate Northrup, in order to truly succeed as a couple with very different habits, you have to find a satisfactory compromise. For instance, one Saturday you eat at the cheap Chinese restaurant near your place, and the next Saturday you go to a high-end restaurant in the city center. Also, you need to have a shared financial blueprint. You would be well-advised to sit down with your partner and have a money date regularly. That means every fortnight, you two discuss your money management and financial goals in an honest way. This will surely help keep those money arguments at bay! On the money date, you can look at your bank accounts, evaluate your spending and work on a budget. This routine will improve your financial situation and make your love life much more satisfying!

Besides, Kate Northrup also teaches people how to overcome emotional spending. Emotional spending refers to an individual’s spending behavior is influenced by feelings, emotions and moods significantly. You cannot predict your emotions when you are making budgets with your lady, yet you can find a way to prevent emotional spending from happening.

Firstly, you should find some alternative activities that make you happy. Rather than spending money when you are sad, you should find an inexpensive alternative activity that will make you feel great. What about going for a walk on the beach or dancing to the music in your living room?

Second, you can set a budget for all unnecessary things that you want to buy, meaning you still need to have a reasonable amount of play money so that you can treat yourself. Yet it is done in a very controlled way so that you will not feel guilty after treating yourself. In fact, treating yourself in this way will help you stop buying things that are more expensive.

Apart from that, some people may want to look at estate planning before they start a new relationship.

Will is the heart of every estate plan.

Will is a simple and effective document which allows you to:

1)         Determine who will inherit your money and other assets;

2)        Nominate a guardian for your child / children;

3)         Arrange for a trust fund or an adult to manage assets that your child / children inherit;

4)        Name an executor that you trust.

How to avoid probate:

Probate refers to the court process of wrapping up all your estate, which is usually a very complicated process, so you may need an estate plan to help you avoid probate. In some countries, the law doesn’t really allow property to pass to spouses without probate if you are a same-sex couple. Fortunately, you are able to avoid probate with the help of the following tools:

1)         Joint Ownership;

2)        Transfer-on-Death Accounts, Registrations & Deeds;

3)         Living Trusts.

Having said that, if you don’t really have a lot of property, chances are you don’t really need to plan for probate, which is good news.

Have a financial power of attorney.

You give your financial power of attorney the power over your finances. In reality, you might have a limited power of attorney for a particular purpose or a period of time. You can also have a durable power of attorney who will look after your money in case you cannot look after your finances by yourself.

Final arrangements:

A final arrangements document is usually a part of your estate plan as well. You specify your plans and wishes for your final arrangements, e.g. cremation or burial, embalming, caskets and urns, headstones or burial markers, ceremonies and paying for final arrangements. I know this isn’t something that people want to discuss when they are madly in love, but it’s solid and real dating advice.

  • Rich Dad, Poor Dad (by Robert Kiyosaki)

Another great book about finances. Robert Kiyosaki’s book not only teaches key information about financial management, but also shows people how successful individuals operate in life and in business. After reading this book, you will know how to think about money and life in a very different way! More importantly, you will understand the difference between assets and liabilities. Basically, anything that puts money in your pocket is an asset, e.g. a property that makes money for you as an investment (tenants are paying rent every month), a business that is automated by managers and employees, etc. In contrast, anything that takes money out of your pocket is a liability, e.g. a house that you live in (you pay maintenance fees), etc. Also, those who are interested in entrepreneurship should definitely read this book because Robert Kiyosaki teaches you the key mindset that a successful entrepreneur has. Of course, if you would like to learn more about business, investing and entrepreneurship, you probably need to read every book written by Robert Kiyosaki who specializes in these areas. Note that Robert Kiyosaki has a great sense of humor, so you will enjoy every page in every book.

  • Boundaries in Dating (by Henry Cloud)

Setting boundaries is the most important thing in a romantic relationship because when boundaries are not clear, romance becomes complicated. Well, if this is a new concept in your world, you have to read this book as soon as possible as you cannot miss out on this principle in dating and relationships. Also, those who are looking to get married soon should read Henry Cloud’s Boundaries in Marriage as well.

“You and your girlfriend can be each other’s accountability buddy and support each other in this journey.”

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