What are you supposed to do when your best friend since you were in diapers doesn’t like the love of your life? Are you supposed to throw away decades of friendship or are you supposed to ditch the significant other in order to placate the bestie?
Before you make any decisions, you have to sit back and think about why your friend and your partner may be like oil and vinegar. Are they picking up on something that you cannot (or choose not to) see?
Your friend may witness a few too many arguments between you and your partner. Maybe they notice that your partner is controlling or they disrespect you.
Being blissfully in love, you may not see it. However, your friend may witness these things and decide not to tell you because they see that you’re happy – even if you’re unaware of the red flags.
If your friend is openly not accepting of your relationship, ask them why. If they mention any of these red flags, don’t be quick to dismiss them! Sit back and objectively look at your relationship.
As we get older, you stop caring about what other people think because you’ve finally become comfortable in your own skin. You know what you want and you know what you will and will not accept from others. This means you’ve gained wisdom and you can trust your instincts better.
With that said, look at the people around you. Is it just your bestie who is against your partner, or is it more than just them? Does your family approve?
If it’s just one person who disapproves of your partner, you can chalk it up to different personalities and they just don’t get along.
But, if it’s more than one person, chances are there’s something going on that they are trying to protect you from. You have to step outside of yourself and listen to what they are saying.
It’s going to be hard, and you’re probably going to be on the defensive, but give them a chance.
Listen to what they have to say and really think about their concerns. These people have been with you for a lot longer than your partner and they will be around if you decide to break up with your partner. You have to remember that their critical comments about the person you’re seeing isn’t because they want to hurt you – they want to make sure you’re happy and you aren’t being disrespected or hurt.
Now, keep in mind that their complaints could range from something serious like they don’t like that your partner spends most of their time out with friends you’ve never met, or spends a lot of money on the lottery. Or the complaints could be small like your partner never washes their hands after using the restroom (ew!) or they have a bad habit of not saying excuse me after burping.
When it comes to your happiness, you have to remember that your friends and family only want the best for you. You could be head over heels in love with someone and not see the warning signs that they are a bad person, despite your friends and family telling you they disapprove.
You have to take a step back and carefully consider what your loved ones are telling you. Remember, these are the people who were there before your partner and they’ll be there for you no matter what.